Loyal Friends - Series on Friendship

 A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need. 

Proverbs 17:17 NLT

December 1963

Every autumn, every year, my heart remembers a time of personal and spiritual growth. After a malignant brain tumor surgery, my grandmother retains her abilities to comprehend situations but struggled verbally to express herself. Recalling the summer of 1974 finds me thankful for these last months of sharing, both through tears and gestures, but always laughter was louder. Reflections of my paternal grandmother's last stage of living always bring to mind an unusual demonstration of friendship. Her friend remains faceless to me. She's just a name that I heard from time to time over the years. And, just as mysteriously, for nearly 5 months, a red rose arrived each day.

A Remnant of Love

Once long, long ago, who knows just when,

            Greetings were exchanged.

Neighbors for a while, some say, these two

            Strangers became friends.

Conversations of yester-year gone

            And unrecorded,

How I wish I could go back in time

            To find the secret

Of such enduring friendship, a gift

            Of the heart for life . . . 

Sunny skies and death, together, cast down

            Shadows on my soul.

Precious as gold, time seemed all too short;

            She would soon be gone.

Silent tears of helplessness inside;

            Laughter was louder.

Old stories retold became treasures,

            Priceless memories.

Although miles and miles apart, friendship 

            Did not notice, and

Always, a token of remembrance

            Was placed by her side.

Gentle reminder, gesture of love,

            Each day one red rose.

Only once did she speak to me of 

            Death, my constant thought.

Relentless, calloused foe of mortal

            Life claimed her spirit . . .

Her body lay empty beneath a 

            Blanket of roses.

I stood beside her grave in sorrow

            For my loss; I wept.

I remember taking one red rose,

            A final farewell.

For me it was a symbol of her

            Friend’s tender heart,

Of such enduring friendship, a gift,

            A remnant of love.

Although more than a decade has passed,

             I still think of her.

Those priceless memories come to mind

            As if time stood still.

Each year when autumn breezes whisper,

            Tears seek revival.

Beneath the sadness I remember

            Laughter was louder.

And my heart is blessed as I recall

            Her final months, when

Always, a token of remembrance

            Was placed by her side.

Gentle reminder, gesture of love, 

            Each day one red rose.

How I wish I could go back in time

            To find the secret

Of their enduring friendship, a gift 

Of the heart for life.

(written 1987, Donna Oswalt)

I wrote this poem more than a decade after her death, words eluding my emotions until then. And still, when I think of such friendship, the best definition I can think of is "each day one red rose." What an amazing heart-gift! What a demonstration of love and loyalty! The Life Application Study Bible says, "The greatest evidence of genuine friendship is loyalty." Over nearly four decades later, I have learned this kind of friendship is extremely rare.

God never asks us to do something without having demonstrated it Himself. Jesus tells us to love one another and demonstrates this rare kind of love with His life, death and resurrection. By definition loyalty manifests itself by devotion, honesty, sincerity and support.God models His loyalty to us though His constancy, incorruptibility, steadfastness, and truth. Genuine relationships understand the value of sharing life events; to remember the beginnings, to treasure the laughter, to honor the celebrations, to bear the disappointments, to endure the ordinary, and to love through the endings. God promises to love forever! 

Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:7 NLT) God's love is much more than a token of remembrance or a gesture of love. Christ's unmatched sacrifice becomes God's matchless grace. This holy gift of enduring friendship redefines loyalty's unfailing love as Perfect Love. I have learned this friendship is the rarest of all! ~ dho

Series on Friendship previously posted on BreathingRoomForMySoul.com/copyright DonnaOwalt

Privileged Intimacy - Series on Friendship

 ". . . I have called you friends. . ." John 15:15

Scholars find numerous references to the philosophy of friendship when they study the great thinkers of centuries long ago like Aristotle, Socrates, and Plato. Frequently the Greco-Roman writers discuss the topic of friendship suggesting it takes a variety of forms, as alliances or patrons or clients. Greeks traditionally hold a concept that friendship is mutual companionship, emphasizing loyalty and equality. The Greeks maintain that a true friendship is an intimate relationship where there is mutual sharing of possessions and confidences. This is the kind of friendship that Jesus reveals in John chapter 15, when He denotes the differences between a servant and a friend. 

When John retells these last conversations of Jesus, he uses the Greek word philios for friends. This means a friend dearly loved, a personal, intimate bond, a trusted, confidential relationship. In one of His last conversations, Jesus is telling the Disciples that they are His dearly loved and trusted friends. Jesus describes His deep love for them, "I've loved you the way my Father has loved Me." (vs.10) During these last hours together, Jesus once again reveals Himself as Lord and Master, but instead of servants, He calls them friends. Friendship with Jesus exceeds loyalty; He defines holy friendship as a promise of privileged intimacy. - dho 

Series on Friendship previously posted on BreathingRoomForMySoul.com in 2013 @copyrightDonnaOwalt